Perspective 04/0815

After missing that 205 mark last night I was disappointed, angry and I felt like a failure. I don't mind feeling angry, but the other two emotions are ridiculous. This journey isn't just one of a physical transformation it's mental as well. And I think anyone in this game will tell you the same thing, you push your body, but you push your mind as well and that's probably more important. So I sat down and put my progress in perspective. I started working out a little over a year ago, I weighed somewhere around 189lbs. I was doughy and flabby and could barely get my 12lb dumbells off the damn floor. I started going to train at Real Strength and went to 3 classes before I had to leave. At that time, when I left, I could deadlift about 135lbs., max. Presses were excrutiating, and I could barely knowck out 10 hanging knee raises.


I kept up my training at home and got down to a weight of about 153lbs. Then in February I made the descision to train for Strongman/woman. I got back in the gym and started busting my ass 2 hours a week, and doing conditioning at home for 2 days a week.

Soooo..... to date, I've had 18 hours in the gym since last summer. My deadlifts have gone from 135lbs (with a struggle) to 195lbs. (with a struggle lol). That's a 60lb increase in 18 hours of gym time. I can do 80 reps of 45lb presses and still manage to move my arms afterwards, my max on presses is about 95lbs for 5 reps. I can do weighted hanging knees raises with almost no issues. And more than all that, more than all the weight I've moved, I've never quit. I've never tapped out during a training session, I've never not done what was asked and in some cases I did more because I wasn't happy.

I'm not a failure, and I won't allow myself to think that anymore. The biggest opponent we face is a negative mindset about ourselves. Today I defeated that unworthy opponent.