I am sick to death of screwing up my diet. I'm definitely at a low point right now, that's for certain. I'm upset that I can't seem to make the right choices, upset that I apparently have no will power when it comes to food and upset that I suck at prepping. I feel like I'm failing big time at something that should be relatively straightforward. Old ghosts are popping back up - emotional eating, eating from boredom - and I feel weak because of it.
I guess, I should break this down for myself into simpler steps. Maybe step one should be to go through my cookbooks and pick out recipes that can be prepped ahead for the week. Then make a shopping list. Then go shopping. Then cook. It's not so much the meals that get me, it's the damn snacks. I HAVE to have snacks. I sit in a cubicle all day and if I don't have something to snack on I feel like I'm going insane. The problem is that I don't buy anything good so I'm left to get something from the "snack cabinet" here at work and that's all junk. I know it's junk; but I eat it anyhow. My energy is low, attitude is sucky and my drive is sluggish. I hate feeling this way and I know exactly how to change it, it's just a matter of doing it.
Sigh.....I love to eat, and I love eating good stuff, so at least I have that going for me. My choices on healthy eating are enormous, so I have to put those choices in front of me instead of shitty, junk food choices that will poison my system.
I have my homework for after the gym tonight then...cookbooks, list-making and planning. I should be able to do this. Should.
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