Overcast and Overhead

KETTLEBELL WORK
 35lb swing x5
35lb single arm swing x5 right
35lb single arm swing x5 left
35lb swing x5
35lb single arm swing x5 right
35lb single arm swing x5 left
35lb overhead swings x10
(35lb goblet squats x5) 5x
35lb push press x5 right
35lb push press x5 left
35lb double rack carry 80'
35lb double suitcase carry 80'
35lb double rack carry 80'
35lb double suitcase carry 80'
55lb swing x10
(55lb overhead swing x5) 2x
(55lb goblet squat x5) 3x
55lb single suitcase carry 80' right
55lb single suitcase carry 80' left
35lb push press x5 right
35lb push press x5 left
35lb swing x5
35lb single arm swing x5 right
35lb single arm swing x5 left
35lb swing x5
35lb single arm swing x5 right
35lb single arm swing x5 left
••••••••••
It wasn't as sunny as it was yesterday but that was fine with me. It made it much more bearable and not quite as draining. It was still warm and muggy though, but I'm used to this weather. I was able to do two sets of 5 on the 55lb overhead swings today and that was a good thing. I also bumped the squats up to sets of 5. I did feel some aggravation in my knee, but it's feeling OK now. If the weather holds tomorrow, I'll be back outside. I thought I saw rainin the forecast though, so I may be stuck in the basement. 

Meeting The Bar

BENCH / DB ROW
55lb, 1.5 reps x10 / 45lb row x5
55lb x10 / 45lb rows x5
45lb x10 / 45lb row x5
45lb, 1.5 reps x10 / 45lb rows x5
••••••••••
FACE PULLS / TRI PULL DOWNS:
40lb x10 / x10
60lb x10 / x10
80lb x10 / x4
••••••••••
DB CURLS:
25lb standard x10
25lb hammer x10
25lb gladiator x10
25lb zottman x10
••••••••••
HANGING KNEE RAISE:
x10, 5x

First night back on the bar in what, a month? Maybe more. My shoulder still has zero power behind it, but that's OK, it'll heal in time. Shoulders are slow to heal and you just can't rush it. But you can't not move it either because then it'll seize up. At least that's what I've found to be true for me. So I keep the weight low and keep using it to maintain some mobility. The curls were ugly as sin and I probably should have dropped the weight, but I was having a moment of pride. All in all, a decent  night back in. Looking at going for some lower body tomorrow if my knee allows it. 
All I want, in the end, is to be relatively pain free. I'm in desperate need of a chiropractic adjustment because I can feel myself being tweaked and out of alignment. My neck kills me everyday. Most mornings I wake up in agony literally from head to toe and it's wearing me down. I know all this pain will never  be totally gone. There's always going to be something that aches here and there. It's the constant pain that I would like to be rid of.
Anyhow, that's enough complaining. I'm way better off than some people and I'm thankful for that.

This Is Not The End

DAY 20 OF 20

35lb kb swings
(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time: 19:53

Well, it's done! 20 days, 10,000 swings. A total weight moved of 350,000 lbs. My average time over the past 20 days is right around 22 minutes. I started at 38 minutes and tonight ended 19 minutes faster. I've only lost maybe 5 lbs. But I think it did much more for my conditioning than my fat content. I've all but given up on that, but that's a blog for another day. 
I'm sore but I'm proud of myself. Even with the few days missed in the middle, I'm glad that I didn't give up and walk away. I fell, but got up (one knee at a time) and got back at it. I'm nothing if I'm not tenacious. I will cuss, swear, complain, pout, make faces, but I WILL finish what I set out to do. 
I'm going to maybe take a day off tomorrow, and then Frank and I will try getting back at the bar. I don't know what or how, but something will be lifted in some manner. This is not the end, but a transistion. A transistion from good to better.

Working With Em & Cayenne

Day 19 of 20

35lb kb swings:
(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time: 20:50

I wasn't concerned about time tonight, I just wanted to finish. I'm tired and my joints are sore but I did it. I did it with the help of my sidekick Emily and music by Kanye or as Emily calls him, Cayenne.
One more day to go. I've never looked so forward to a Monday in my life.

Well That Sucks

Day 18 of 20

35lb KB swings
(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time: 20:51

I'm pissed. Really. I thought I had at least been in the ballpark of last night's time, but 3 minutes slower?? What the actual fuck? I felt strong, I felt pretty damn good. And then I add up my time and I see this nonsense? Psh. I'm not happy. I don't know where the issue lies. I don't truly expect my times to be exact measures of time. I mean, +/- a few seconds is understandable. But 3 minutes slower?!?!? Gaagh. Whatever. I finished the night with strong, steady swings and I'm just going to have to be happy with that.

Discipline Is Not Mediocre

Day 17 of 20

35lb KB swings:
(x10, x15, x25, x50 ) 5x

Time: 17:44

Last night I said I was going to swing before I ate. That didn't happen but I frickin blew through last night's time. Switched up the music and pushed my body to move when it didn't want to. This whole working out, lifting, swinging, whatever, it's so much more of a mental game than people want to tell you. It's easy to tell someone that they have to have discipline. But how about you tell them that means having to yell at themselves to get off their lazy ass and push the weight? People need to be told the truth that it doesn't matter if they have 100 people blowing smoke up their ass and patting them on the back because if they don't hold themselves accountable no changes they make are going to last. People need to be told that it's not always sunshine and rainbows when you're trying to be fit. Somedays, a lot of days suck ass; you're going to physically hurt and mentally you're going to wonder just why in the actual hell you're doing this. You know why you're doing all this? You're doing it to be better. You're pushing yourself to strive not for mediocrity but for greatness. And because you're an imperfect little human, you're going to have to fight with yourself more often than not to keep going. When others are shaking their heads, calling you crazy, and arrogant, and full of yourself, you'll remember all those arguments you've had in your mind, and all those pep talks with your brain and you'll smile. It's that moment when you realize how far you've come. You'll finally understand what discipline means and what it means to move past mediocrity. 

I Like Turtles

Day 16 of 20

35lb KB swings
(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time: 23:17

I felt steady tonight. Let us not forget the old adage,  steady usually hangs around with slow. Tonight's time was slow; slower than I would have liked. I need to try and push myself a little more. I get sidetracked by music sometimes, sometimes it's chatting with my daughter, sometimes it's just me being sluggish. I did eat dinner before I swung tonight which in hindsight was probably not such a hot idea. Tomorrow I'll swing first, eat second. We'll see if that makes a noticeable difference. But you know, I like turtles. They always seem to finish the race so I'm good with that.

Stronger

Day 15 of 20

35lb KB Swings:

(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time: 21:43

A smidge faster than last night, no speed records set, for sure. Feeling good just the normal aches and pains. I did wake up with a horrible migraine from a tweaked out neck, so I'm going to make sure to take an antiinflammatory before bed. Maybe after all this bullshit virus stuff rolls by I can go see a chiropractor or something.

I'm Back! (No Pun Intended)

Day 14 of an extended 20

35lb KB swings
(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time: 20:18

After a few days off due to stupidity and a weak back, I'm back on track to complete the last 7 days of what was supposed to be a 20 day challenge. I'm feeling much better probably still not 100%, but I can walk totally upright. I'm not being sarcastic here, I was a living Quasimodo for awhile. I'm still in need of a chiropractor and a good adjustment but for now, I'll make do and muddle through as always. I feel pretty confident that I could have made the 20 days. I'm sure this challenge will happen again at some point. I'd like to ultimately do it with my 55lb bell, but I may have to do mini challenges with that one at first. Maybe 20 days of 100 swings with that and the rest with the 35lb bell. We'll see. I miss my weights and I miss doing strongman stuff, oddball stuff. I guess I just miss being strong. 
Well anyway, I'm glad I was able to start again.
6 days to go.

How Many Was That?

Day 13 of 20

35lb KB swings:
(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time: 18:46

So, yeah, I did it pretty quickly tonight. Here are my thoughts as to possible reasons why.
I had a timer in front of my face. I put on a timer with last night's time on it and had it counting down while my music played. With that timer right in front of me, I could time my rests more accurately. It's clear to me that 10 seconds in my mind is a far cry away from 10 seconds in reality.
Also, I switch between hard swings and soft swings. Soft swings seem to take a smidge longer. I don't think that would account for too much of a time difference though. In all honesty, I think it was mainly the fact that even though I thought I wasn't resting long, I really was. So from now on, I'll use a timer to at least make sure that my rests are accurate.
On a side note, counting my reps was a challenge tonight. I couldn't focus my thoughts and my mind kept wandering just enough to almost lose count. I hate that.
I had a dream last night about being in a deep, paused squat. I have no idea what the dream was about, or any other details of that dream. I just remember the squat, and it felt good. I will lose this weight, rehab these old knees and squat again. I've been told.

Who Put The Mountain In The Way?

Day 12 of 20

35lb Kettlebell Swings
(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time: 24:03

I seem to be getting slower. I thought, seeing as how this was the downhill slope of the challenge that I would be getting stronger and going faster. Apparently, that is the wrong analogy. This is turning out more like a mountain climb. The closer you get to your goal, the higher up the mountain you are and the more force you're working against. 
Who knows. All I know is that I'm physically and mentally tired. I will mention that the past few days I haven't been using my knee sleeves and both knees seem to be....ok. The left is still puffy and tight when I bend it and both have pain if I step the wrong way. I'm not too sure about doing squats after this. I want to - I miss them. A trip to the doc may be in order if I can't figure out a remedy on my own. 

Sunday Slowdown

Day 11 of 20

35lb KB swings
(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time: 24:27

Much slower than I would have liked, but I'm honestly not surprised. I was absolutely dragging today.
Here's to making tomorrow better.

Half And Half

Day 10 of 20

35lb KB swings:
(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time 22:27

Almost a full minute slower than last night. Not too happy with that, however, I did just spend three and a half hours planting a vegetable garden. So maybe it's not too bad.
I'm halfway through this challenge. I haven't seen any weight loss. So let's discuss that for one moment. Back in February I went in for day surgery to have a cyst removed from my ovary. In the pre-op room the doctor came in and said they were going to take the whole ovary and tube. She said I wouldn't notice any difference in hormones and that hormone replacement therapy wouldn't be needed. Good. Cool. Fast forward to a couple of weeks after surgery - night sweats and hot flashes are out of control as well as mood swings. And weight gain - yeah. Great. I had put on weight over the past 5 years, probably about 25 pounds. But now I had an extra 10 hanging out on me. It just won't budge. I'll lose 5 and gain it back, lose 3 and gain it back. It's frustrating beyond belief because it's never been this difficult for me to lose weight. My eating habits could be better, but honestly, they haven't changed much over the past year or so and certainly haven't changed in the past few months to account for 10 more pounds. I'm going to tighten the food up even more and continue with this challenge and see if any of these pounds go away. I feel as though I have more energy and since starting a regime of training every day, the mood swings have even out and so have the hot flashes and night sweats. THANK THE GODS!!!! (night sweats suck ass). I'm hoping that with some more steadfast activity every day I'll finally gain a foothold on this weight. I don't like being this flabby. 
So anyhow, half way done and half way to go.

This Kid's Not Alright

Day 9 of 20

35lb KB swings
(x10, x15, x25, x50) 5x

Time: 21:34

I focused on going a little deeper in the swings tonight and really getting a good hip thrust on the push through. I feel it in my arse, for certain, but I also feel it a lot in my triceps and forearms tonight. 
Tomorrow will be the official half-way point. I have contemplated, more than once, "taking a day off". I mean, at the end of the day, I have exactly zero people to answer to for doing this. I signed no contracts, I made no promises to anyone to keep this up and I know my boyfriend and daughter would still love me if I skipped a day. Wait...I did make a promise to someone, I did spiritually sign a contract and I have exactly one person to answer to at the end of each and every day - MYSELF. As I said before in a previous post, I'm tired of letting myself down.
This challenge is surely a physical one; it's a strenuous activity to repeatedly swing 35lbs through the air. Above that, however, this is a mental challenge. It's a challenge to build grit and tenacity and discipline and drive. This is an unpleasant task to accomplish. I know that for some people out there, exercise is a release and a joy. It's a chance to bond with like-minded people looking to drop a few pounds and get in shape for summer. It is that for me, in part, as well. Aside from the socializing aspect, I can get in line with all of that. But for me, as well as some other people I associate with, it's more than exercise. It's training, it's working out, it's lifting. And sometimes it friggin sucks ass. Moving large amounts of weight can be a daunting activity that strains every part of your body and pushes you to your physical limits. I've surely dropped the weight back on this challenge, but I increased the mental strain. To go down to the basement, day after fucking day and swing that goddamn bell makes me question my sanity. I thought I had lost 4 lbs, but it turns out it likes me and decided to find me again (more on that in another post - maybe). I've seen a slight tightening to my arms and butt and legs. Other than that, there have been no miraculous changes. Or has there? I have gone, I think, 12 days straight of working out. No rest days, no "days off", no excuses. I have forced myself to do this because I WILL NOT ALLOW MYSELF TO GIVE UP.
At the end of these 20 days I will be able to look back and say that I accomplished something that not a whole hell of a lot of people can do. I will be able to say that above making my body stronger, I've made my character stronger. No matter how wrong this kid is in a lot of ways, my character is nothing but right.